Sadly, I’m Not Peter Parker

February is simply flying by! I’d better recap before it disappears.

Valentine’s Day was super low key. Sappy sucker that I am, I gave Tara a card in the morning. She admitted, rather embarrassedly, that she did not have one for me. I told her that was okay. It’s never been my favorite holiday; I don’t hate it, but I feel like it’s unnecessary. My friend Heidi says V-Day is her favorite holiday, and I joked that it ranked around #17 for me, a notch below Arbor Day (I do love me some trees!) but higher than President’s Day. Probably because I have to work on Monday, and Tara does not, and I am bitter about that. Speaking of my lovely wife, she did in fact come home with a card for me and a dark chocolate bar, so the day was not a complete wash.

Don’t worry, we were plenty romantic in Astoria. 🙂

I think a spider bit me in the shower a few days ago. Trust me when I say, there are few things as traumatic. I felt something on my hand, glanced down, saw a small dark object that may or may not have had eight legs, and did a jerky little dance that sent it down the drain. Whether or not I also screamed is irrelevant to the tale. My hand was then itchy for a couple of days, but I did not suddenly gain the ability to shoot webs from my wrists (too bad, because how cool would that have been!?) so I trust that all is well now.

ultimate_spider_man_renderStill wondering how a spider ended up on my hand while in the shower of all places. I can only surmise that he was lurking on the shower curtain and scurried onto me when I opened it.

I broke down and bought Girl Scout cookies on Monday.

At first, when Justin walked around trying to sell them, I told him thanksbutnothanks. I hadn’t had GS cookies in years. In fact, in one of my not-proudest-moments soon after being discharged from the hospital as a newly-diagnosed diabetic, I might have told a little girl selling them outside a grocery store that “those sugar bombs will kill you, kid.”

What can I say? I was a lot more militant about my food choices back then. I actually ate a bagel last week. With cream cheese. This is progress, folks. I have learned that I can, in fact, splurge in moderation without suddenly gaining back 70 lbs. or needing to inject myself with insulin. It’s been very liberating. So, two minutes after telling Justin no, I had a change of heart and told him to go ahead and put me down for a couple of boxes. Thin Mints and Trefoils. I was thinking they’d arrive in a few weeks, so when Justin showed up the next day with the cookies, I was a bit surprised. My Content team all put in orders of their own and wasted no time tearing into theirs, but I waited a couple of days before opening mine. My definition of less militant means portioning them out into single servings and limiting myself to once or twice a week. vegetarian_recipe_dessert_thin_mints

I guess I still have a ways to go before I’m completely carefree.

Is anybody else watching The Carbonaro Effect? I first discovered this hidden camera magic show a couple of years ago, but sort of forgot about it until I rediscovered it last week. I have been binge-watching ever since. (It’s on A&E, home to Impractical Jokers, another hilarious guilty pleasure).

Anyway, the host/star, Michael Carbonaro, is a rather nerdy-looking guy but one hell of a magician. Seriously, he’s one of the best sleight-of-handers that I’ve ever seen, and his pranks have become very elaborate and well-executed. I am usually laughing my ass off while wondering out loud, “how in the hell did he do that?!” Highly recommended if you’re looking for a quick dose of laughter and want to be amazed.

I’ve been listening to Prince pretty much nonstop for the past week. Now that he has landed on Spotify, I’m a happy camper indeed.

The truth is, I’m still sad over his death. I’m grieving in a way I have not for most other celebrities. Even my beloved Abe Vigoda. It’s been particularly hard for me to come to terms with. I guess I feel like he was always such a motto for clean and healthy living that even the suggestion of drug abuse is surreal. But…it is what it is. I do not fault him for being human. I had my own dalliance with Vicodin about ten years ago, and understand the powers of addiction more than you might think. I’ve never written about this, but maybe it’s time? Just not today.



12 thoughts on “Sadly, I’m Not Peter Parker

  1. Valentine’s Day is my favorite holiday! One of my college nicknames was ‘The Love Child’ and had nothing to do with my origins.

    The spider thing freaks me out. I swear they come up through the drains!

    At my last physical, my blood glucose reading was sort of high (aggravating AF if you knew how little I eat to begin with) so I’ve been cutting back on the carbs and sweets. Thin Mints rule and still beat the Keebler Elf version!


  2. OMG, I would have died about the spider because they FREAK ME OUT! In Florida, they’re everywhere….including showers. The one spider that scared the hell out of me was the “Recluse” because if they bite you, it can be lethal. Luckily, I never encountered one of those…whew!

    LOVE Thin Mint Girl Scout cookies! To die for!

    “The truth is, I’m still sad over his death. I’m grieving in a way I have not for most other celebrities. ”

    Yes, I know exactly how you feel because I felt (and still do) the same about George Micheal. I got very teary-eyed when I heard Adele’s tribute song to George on the Grammy’s. It was so touching.


    1. Yes, George Michael was another tough one to fathom. I haven’t listened to quite as much of his music as I have Prince’s, but I always considered myself a fan regardless. Let’s hope 2017 doesn’t bring as much grief…


  3. Happy belated Valentine’s to you and Tara!!! Joe and I keep things lowkey too. Our favorite holiday is Halloween after all. We stayed in and made a bunch of appetizer-y foods. The one you guys would’ve loved was toasted mackerel filets with sea salt and piri piri sauce. It was good! We usually put in a thriller or action movie, but this year we watched a classic comedy, A Fish Called Wanda. I love that movie.

    Sorry to hear about the spider. I would be freaking out and routinely check our shower curtain before stepping in after one time where a spider did come crawling across it while I was in. *petrified scream*

    I bought 4 boxes of girl scout cookies, hit up by two young ladies I couldn’t say no to. But I’m sharing them with the volunteers and my co-producers of the Listen To Your Mother show I’m directing. Definitely had thin mints for dinner last night though. Damn. And even worse news for my health, Shamrock Shakes are back! Uggggghhh!

    Have fun listening to Prince. I think a lot of folks still feel as you do. I admire him and the way people feel when listening to his work. Hope you do write about it – whether to share with us or just for your own sake. 🙂


    1. I’ve never had a Shamrock Shake, but I know that they are popular with legions of fans in the same way that the McRib is.

      I definitely want to make your Thai chicken soup recipe. That one sounds right up my alley. The mackerel doesn’t sound half bad either, of course!


  4. I got the Girl Scout cookies an few weeks ago. This is the third year her and her father came by. I look forward to seeing her next year. There is so much sugar in almost all the foods we buy it’s a wonder everyone is not diabetic by age 10.


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