I’ve had some pretty cool assignments in my writing career: a monthly food column in the Vancouver, WA newspaper; a television commercial starring a retired NBA player; an official proclamation for the City of Rapid City. I even got to interview Napoleon Dynamite producer Sean Covel, GOSH!
But I don’t think anything matches the excitement of creating a video script for the governor of Wisconsin.
This recent assignment fell into my lap a few weeks ago and, while I tried to play it cool – all in a day’s work, don’tcha know? – inside, I was giddy with excitement. Opportunities like this are rare. First Madison, next…the west wing?! I can totally see myself as a political speechwriter.
(Not for the current administration, of course. I’d rather stab my eyes out.)
Luckily, Tony (may I call him that?) and I are on the same political page. All I had to do was capture the governor’s folksy down-to-earth style and I’d be golden. So, I watched a bunch of Governor Evers’ speeches to pick up on key mannerisms and turns of phrase and got to work. I resisted the urge to make any references to cheese (this was hard!) and submitted a script that I think is very Tony-like. I can’t wait to see the finished video.
What an honor. Truly. Knowing that a sitting governor will be reading my words out loud gives me chills.
I’d pinch myself, but…ouch.
Shine a Little Light
Tuesday night, right on cue, we saw our first fireflies/lightning bugs of the season. I’d been stepping onto the deck every evening at dusk for the past week, scanning the yard for tiny blinking lights. These magical creatures always show up on June 10, give or take a day or two, every year without fail.
I was so excited when I spotted one, I would have dashed inside the house and ecstatically shared the news with Tara if I weren’t a grown-ass man.
(I totally dashed inside the house and ecstatically shared the news with Tara.)
Yesterday, I shared a post to my Instagram stories with a map like this one:
That post elicited a spirited debate with AutumnAshbough, who said the map was wrong, because people in D.C. (my future home, should this political thing take off!) (just kidding, I’m never moving again, I swear!) call them fireflies. She has never called them lightning bugs in her life, and when I suggested the latter name sounds more badass, she insisted firefly is faster and more alliterative. I’ll grant her the second point, but…say what?!
“They have the same number of syllables!” I said.
“You’ve never lived south of the Mason-Dixon Line,” she replied.
True dat. And so, for the next five minutes, Tara and I tried saying “far-fly” but kept bursting out in laughter over each failed attempt.
I don’t know how y’all do it, my Southern friends, but bless your hearts.
Growing up, my brother and I called them lightning bugs. This was in Ohio and New Jersey, so that tracks. Nowadays, I use both names interchangeably.
There’s a Business Insider article that discusses the regional language differences surrounding nocturnal beetles that emit flashing light. Man, that’s a mouthful!
(That’s what she said.)
One tidbit I find particularly interesting: places where “lightning bug” is more common seem to overlap with areas where lightning strikes are more frequent (red and purple on the map below):
By contrast, “firefly” is the more common term in the region that experiences the most wildfires (here’s lookin’ at you, Out West):
Linguistics are fascinating. Soda vs. pop, casserole vs. hot dish, I never get tired of this stuff.
I don’t really care what they’re called…as long as you don’t say glowworm, you heathen. Or, even worse, Peenie Wallie…unless you’re Jamaican, mon.. I’m just thrilled to live in a place where firebugs (my compromise, also pretty badass) light up the sky for a couple of months every summer.
Do you have fireflies/lightning bugs where you live? What do you call them?
Mark My Words 
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