Yesterday marked our two-year Wisconsin anniversary. Fittingly, but coincidentally, I had both brandy Old Fashioneds and cheese curds. Guess you could say I’m fully assimilated now.
One year ago we’d settled in but were still learning things. I’m not saying we’re Wisconsin experts now – there are still an awful lot of corners of this state left to explore – but after 730 days in America’s Dairyland, I can say unequivocally this feels like home.
Still not a Packers fan though.
My parents rolled into town at 6 p.m. on Thursday and we immediately got down to business.
Let’s just say Happy Hour is a very big deal to my folks. Not that I’m turning anything down, mind you. The weather has turned absolutely delightful after a stretch of heat and humidity earlier in the week and looks to remain that way through the rest of their visit. This is great because it gives us lots of opportunity to enjoy sitting out on the deck. It’s not so great because it gives my dad lots of opportunity to kick my ass at bags/corn hole. Oh, well: you take the good, you take the bad.
Mrs. Garrett could relate to that sentiment.
Saturday, we took my parents to Island Bar & Grill, our favorite hangout on the Rock River. There was live music, a giant pretzel, and not a cloud in the sky. We hung out for a few hours before returning home in the evening, where we hung out some more.
There’s been a lot of hanging out. Which is a nice change of pace from yard work, so no complaints!
Today, we went to a new-to-us winery for brunch, though ironically, my parents – who live 2,004 miles away – are regulars, having discovered Timber Hill during an earlier visit. I was excited to try a Bloody Mary flight, but sadly, all three were pretty meh. My chicken and waffles, on the other hand? Delicious! And it’s a beautiful setting just 15 minutes from home, so I have no doubt we’ll be back.
We have reservations at a supper club this evening, then no real Labor Day plans other than Tara’s phenomenal fish tacos. I’m just thankful for a long weekend.
I’ve cowritten a couple of blog posts with Tara over the years, and those always seem to be well-received. I thought it would be a fun change of pace to do one with my mom since she’s here in person. You’ve probably seen her comment on my blog from time to time, but today, she’s breaking the fourth wall and stepping into the spotlight.
Without further ado, here’s my mom!
When my first birthday rolled around and you reflected upon the previous 12 months, were you glad you’d given birth to me, or did you wish you’d bought a bright red Mercedes 500 SL convertible instead?
Of course we’re happy we had you! The first few months were horrible though. You had colic. Every single evening we had to walk with you up and down the streets. Every time we sat down to dinner you’d start crying. Luckily we were in Hawaii, where the evenings were nice.
Err…sorry about that. Thank you for not dropping me off on the orphanage steps in the middle of the night! Colic-iness aside, are there any standout memories you have of me as a kid?
That one time when you were running around playing in your bedroom and you hit the side of your bed frame and got a big black eye. This was right before Christmas. Everybody thought we beat you.
Yikes…sounds like a close call with Child Protective Services. How about a memory that doesn’t involve bruising?
One of the best things was how much my father loved his grandsons. He didn’t live nearly long enough.
He was pretty great. Even though I only knew him for seven years of my life, I have fond memories. Today, in fact, would have been his 109th birthday. We’ll toast to you tonight, Pop-Pop. My grandfather built houses, but I didn’t inherit the hammer gene. What did you think I’d be when I grew up?
A meteorologist, but you hated math!
This is true. I’ve been obsessed with weather since the third grade. Damn that pesky math! Did you have any inkling I’d be a writer?
When you wrote your first story, The Egg, we knew you had talent. I just wanted you to be happy. I hoped you would become rich and famous.
We all make mistakes in life. What do you feel are some of my biggest?
I can think of two. Crystal and Heather.
Yeah…before Tara, I didn’t have the best luck with women. Did I do good with Tara?
Of course! She makes you happy.
[TARA, IN THE BACKGROUND]: It’s okay, you can answer that after I leave.
We shocked you when we decided to move to Rapid City in 2018. When we announced we were leaving for Wisconsin in 2022, what were your thoughts?
Are you out of your minds?!
Haha. We may have been.
We moved to Vancouver [in 2003] because you were there with our grandchildren, and then you had the nerve to move away! But now that you’ve been here for two years, we’re glad you got what you wanted.
What do you think of Wisconsin?
I like it a lot but we haven’t been here in the wintertime. It’s a lovely house. I like this little town. We love Timber Hill Winery. [NO DOUBT; SEE ABOVE]
How much do I take after you and dad?
I don’t think you’re like us at all. You’re different because you keep moving away from us!
It’s nothing personal. And this is as far east as we’re going. NO MORE MOVES, I SWEAR! You believe me when I say that, right?
No.
Haha. Fair enough! I think most of our family and friends expect us to keep heading east, stopping only when we encounter the Atlantic Ocean.
In any case, that was fun – thank you for sitting down with me for this grueling one-on-one, mom! I’ll have to hit dad up next time.
My parents are here until Friday morning, dear blog readers, so if you have any burning questions you’d like her to answer, I’m sure she’d be game.
Mark My Words 
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