Pro tip: if you’re going to have a garage sale, don’t post it 48 hours early.
I made that mistake today. Not that I blame myself; we have a million and three things going on, and I’m trying to be as efficient as possible. Stayin’ on top of shit. We’re planning a big garage sale on Saturday and I merely wanted to get the word out, so I posted the following ad to three places: Craigslist, Nextdoor, and Facebook Marketplace:
GARAGE SALE – SAT. AUG. 27 8 a.m. – 2:30 p.m.
We’re moving to Wisconsin and have a lot of downsizing to do!
LOTS of household and yard items for sale, including:
• Gas-powered lawnmower
• Side-by-side refrigerator/freezer with water & ice dispenser
• Coffee table
• Large four-person tent w/ “front porch” canopy
• Firewood (by the bundle or lot)
• Paperback/hardcover books
• Household and kitchen appliances
• Various cabinets and stands
• And much more!
Everything must go in one day!
Within minutes, I was deluged with responses from FB Marketplace (which really seems to have the corner on the For Sale market these days). Everybody wanted to know prices for the fridge, tent, and lawn mower. I could have saved myself a lot of hassle if I’d posted them in the ad, I guess. We’re only asking $50 for each of those items.
When I relayed that information, they were practically tripping over their own feet, wanting to buy them NOW. The whole point was to put out a bunch of high-value items to attract people to the rest of our shit, so I had to revise the ad. No early sales. First come, first serve.
Not only did people want to buy these things right away, they wanted to Venmo me the money. NO. This is a cash-only operation, bub. A few asked for my phone number because they wanted to call me to discuss matters.
WTF, people. I was busy at work on my next-to-last day, trying to — you know — do my job and stuff?
So many messages from so many people, all day long. It never stopped. I finally started cutting and pasting my replies. Told them the price and suggested, if they were interested in one of those items, to come by first thing Saturday morning.
I left out the part about being prepared to get into a fistfight over who gets what. I guarantee those three things are going to be sold within the first five minutes.
By the end of the day, I was getting so annoyed, I started jacking up the prices on them. The tent, for instance, doubled in price. It’s yours for $100 if you pick it up tonight, I told one interested buyer. When he asked what it will cost if he picks it up Saturday morning, I said, $50. But be prepared to beat out the 15 other people waiting in line.
Here’s another one:
Screw the “no early sales” rule. If we can get more money than anticipated AND put an end to the barrage of messages, that’s fine by me.
I don’t even know that we’re underpricing anything. The fridge was Doris’s and came with the house. It’s almost 30 years old, for cryin’ out loud! Other lawn mowers go for about $50. The tent is the only thing worth more, but we’re in full-on purging mode.
In any event, it looks like we’ll make some decent money on Saturday. If I don’t lose my mind before then.
Other than the garage sale headache, today was bittersweet. My team had a farewell get-together for me this afternoon. Yes, I’m still working tomorrow, but this was the last day the whole marketing department would be in the office. They offered to pick me up a pie from a local bakery, but I said, we really need to do a cheesecake instead.
My boss gave a heartfelt speech about how much he’ll miss my positive attitude (there’s that glass-is-spilling-over mentality again) and sense of humor, and told me I’m a great writer.
Then, I had an exit interview with the HR director, who drove in from our Wall HQ to do it in-person. She and I have always had a great rapport, so I suspect she really just wanted to see me one more time.
Everybody has been very supportive and complimentary. If you must leave a job, I highly recommend doing so under good terms.
It sure beats the alternative.
Tara and I had planned to drive through the Black Hills this evening, but today was surprisingly gloomy and cool. Lots of fog and drizzle. Tomorrow’s going to be sunny, so we’ll do that then.
Lots more to share. I’ll be back here tomorrow, I’m sure!