I think I need to lawyer up.
Because six years ago, I came up with this amazing idea: Drumstick Bites. I wrote that the last bite of a Drumstick ice cream cone, with that solid chunk of chocolate, was the best part of the whole thing, so I wanted to sell packages of Drumstick Bites “and market them as a decadent summertime treat.” If you follow the link, you’ll see this was written on July 17, 2015.
A few days ago, Tara sent me a link. “Somebody went and did it,” she said. Who’s the somebody and what did they do?
Two somebodys, to be exact. Jarod and Tyler. They stole my idea and launched their own product called Muddy Bites (the name leaves a lot to be desired IMHO). These are being marketed as “the best part of a sundae cone, now available as a bite-sized snack.”
Hmm. Why does that sound familiar?
Oh.
Right.
BECAUSE I INVENTED THE DAMN THINGS SIX YEARS AGO.
If you look at their About Us page, they write, We originally started back in 2018 when we had an idea to make our favorite part of a sundae cone as a bite-sized snack.
Now that’s good humor, man.
Quit giving yourselves self-congratulatory pats on the back, dudes. You’re not the first ones to have that idea. You just took it a step further by launching a Kickstarter campaign, while I’ve Startedkicking myself for not following through. If I’d seriously sought out investors, I too might have been able to move into a 2,500-square foot facility in Ames, Iowa, and roll out my product (MY PRODUCT!) to 200 Hy-Vee and 7-Eleven retail locations.
Now they’re setting their sights on Walmart, Target, and Costco. They’ve had 50,000+ online orders and employ 40+ team members.
Not that I’m bitter or anything.
And of course, I’m not really going to sue them! I’d never be able to prove they actually read my blog post. The fact that I’m still a million bucks shy of being a millionaire rests squarely on my shoulders. Just the idea of starting and running a business exhausts me.
I might send them a friendly email with a link to that post, though. Just for kicks.
The ironic thing is, this isn’t even the first time I’ve come up with a brilliant product idea, only to see somebody else profit from it. I also invented the smoothie and spray tans.
Seriously.
Well, at least the spray tans part…
I was an advertising major in college, and for my campaigns class, we were tasked with creating and marketing a new product. I lived in California at the time, where it’s sunny 364 days of the year and tanning is an obsession. I thought, why not develop a self-tanning spray that would give you bronzed skin without the risk of melanoma? And thus, I came up with Tan In a Can.
Fast-forward several years. Not only are spray tans a thing, but so too is Tan In a Can!
If you’re counting, that’s twice in my life I’ve missed out on fame and fortune. I think I missed my calling: business consultant. I’m clearly the idea guy, while others do the actual legwork.
I’ve always joked that my college professor is probably tooling around the Bay Area in a Ferrari these days, while I’m stuck driving a Hyundai.
But, hey…at least it’s got a nifty astronaut button!
Mark My Words 
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