I was clearing out old LinkedIn messages recently and came across one from a former coworker named Jason. He reached out to me last February because he was considering a cross-country move and knew I embodied that whole “rolling stone gathers no moss” mentality.
During the course of our conversation, he asked, Do you have any thoughts on Wisconsin?
To which I replied, Wisconsin? Sign me up! We stayed in Madison one night on the return leg of our road trip and really liked that town. Wisconsin is surprisingly scenic. I’ve joked to Tara that we should move to Madison next. We won’t…but if for some reason we ever did relocate again, that would be high on our list.
A little more than six months later, we’d quit our jobs, sold our house, and were about to hit the road for Wisconsin. Life sure is funny, huh?
I’ve always had strong opinions about places I’d consider living. Most people concentrate on factors like cost of living, job market, housing, crime rate, that sort of thing. Those are important, sure…but what’s the cheese situation like?
OK, fine. Cheddar never figured into the equation. But I do tend to focus on other less-common intangibles.
Case in point: I refuse to live in any city that starts with either Los or Las. I don’t much care for anything beginning with San, either. Been there, done that, couldn’t wait to leave. And just to prove that I’m not totally caught up on words, letters matter, too. States that end with the letter n are an automatic yes, while those that end in i fall under the Hell, No category.
Compass directions are trickier but still carry weight. South Dakota was a yes and North Dakota a no, but if I had to choose a Carolina, I’d do North over South. And while the phrase Go West, young man was a rallying cry in the 1800s, I’d pick Regular Virginia over West Virginia. Probably ‘cuz I’m not a coal miner.
Contours matters, too. I find rectangles and whimsical shapes most appealing. Roundish Ohio and mitten-shaped Wisconsin and Michigan are too dang cute to dislike, especially if you’re lucky enough to snag a home on the thumb! Believe it or not, there’s an ongoing rivalry over which state is more mitten-like.
Then there’s New Jersey. The poor thing looks like it’s doubled over in pain after getting punched in the stomach — rather appropriate given that it’s kind of a punching bag for the rest of the U.S. — but I would (and have) live(d) there. I gravitate toward states that begin with New, anyway…at least ones without deserts. I don’t think I could live in a state with a panhandle, but if I lived in Idaho, I’d only want to live in the panhandle.
I also like Minnesota because it’s got a little chimney that contains the “Northwest Angle,” which by all rights should belong to Canada. This part of the state never even touches the rest of Minnesota; it’s separated by a lake and the only land it borders is Manitoba. It feels like a blatant land grab, and I can’t help but admire that kind of chutzpah (even if we did fleece the otherwise lovely Canadians).
I’m not the only one who spends this much time obsessing over geography, right?
Mark My Words 
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