21 Reasons Why ’21 Didn’t Suck

When I woke up this morning, it was snowing and 5º. I lounged in my recliner, sipping a cup of coffee, watching the snow pile up as the temperature dropped. It was down to zero when Tara left shortly before 8 a.m. I felt bad that she had to work and was grateful that I … Continue reading 21 Reasons Why ’21 Didn’t Suck

If You Need Me, I’ll Be Busy Rescuing Kids from a Burning Building

Years ago, when I had to come up with weekly blog topics on ENT conditions, I set up a bunch of Google Alerts. These are notifications you receive whenever Google finds new results based on search terms you specify. Mine were based on keywords such as ears, nose, throat, and allergies. Whenever a relevant article … Continue reading If You Need Me, I’ll Be Busy Rescuing Kids from a Burning Building

You’ll Have to Pry This Cookie Gun From My Cold, Dead, Flour-Dusted Hands

At one point on Sunday afternoon, I was gathering and stacking wood while Tara was in the kitchen baking. Then I went downstairs to watch football while she busied herself doing laundry. Rarely have our gender roles been so clearly—and, it must be said, stereotypically—defined. It's not always like that. Honestly, it's rarely like that. … Continue reading You’ll Have to Pry This Cookie Gun From My Cold, Dead, Flour-Dusted Hands

Dance with the Devil & You’re Gonna Get Burned

Here’s a friendly little PSA: if you’re ever offered a pretzel with the name Lucifer’s Straight Jacket, avoid it at all costs. Unless you’d rather spend the next 20 minutes with your mouth on fire and tears streaming down your face. If that’s the case, knock yourself out, bro. This is a classic case of … Continue reading Dance with the Devil & You’re Gonna Get Burned

Wash, Rinse, Reheat

When our microwave crapped out on us two months ago, we sort of shrugged our shoulders. "No big deal," we said. "How much do we really use a microwave anyway?" Well. The answer, it turns out, is a lot. Reheating leftovers, of course. Which we managed to do on the stove or in the oven, … Continue reading Wash, Rinse, Reheat

The Last Dinner

When we moved to the Midwest three point five years ago, some cultural adjustments were necessary. For starters, we had to get used to people who were overwhelmingly nice. Began to think of “traffic” as being third in line at a red light instead of inching forward on a freeway for hours. Discovered that Fleet … Continue reading The Last Dinner

I Won’t Tell No One Your Name

It’s December, which means the most wonderful time of the year. The holidays? Nope! Spotify Wrapped. Not everybody feels this way. A lot of people complain about being subjected to an endless social media bombardment of statistics they care nothing about. They say Spotify Wrapped is nothing more than a data aggregator or marketing tool. … Continue reading I Won’t Tell No One Your Name