A Merit Badge in Ghost Hunting

Like A Vampire

Yesterday evening, I came up with the bizarre idea that it would be fun to move the furniture around in my bedroom. I’ve lived in my townhouse nearly five years now, and my bed has always been in the same spot: with the headboard right in front of the window. Truth is, though the master bedroom is roomy, it’s got weird angles and short walls that pretty much limit your options for placing a bed. Still, I’m a guy who likes to change things up every once in awhile, so I decided to get creative and flip the bed around, placing it at a 90-degree angle to where it was previously, which necessitated moving the nightstand, lamp, clock, etc. It looked okay where it was, though it made the room look slightly smaller. I was excited about the change, and when it was time for bed, eagerly dove beneath the covers to enjoy my first night’s sleep in the new layout.

Only, right away, the arrangement bugged me. Where before I slept facing a wall, now there was the window, and a tiny frame of light outlining the curtains. I’m a guy who likes to sleep in the dark; the smallest amount of light can drive me crazy. So I turned onto my left side instead, facing into the room. The big, empty room, without a wall there like I was used to. Worse, my smoke detector’s little green light blinks constantly, despite the addition of fresh batteries. You can’t even tell during the day, but at night, it seemed bright as a lighthouse warning ships to steer clear. I couldn’t believe that such subtle little differences would bother me so much, so I willed myself to ignore them, but the hours passed by, sleep as elusive as ever. Finally, at 4 AM, I did what any sane person would do under the circumstances: turned the light on and rearranged my bed and nightstand to where they had been originally. Yeah, I know. Anal much? During my road trip, I spent thirteen nights in strange hotel rooms, and never had trouble falling asleep. You’d think that because this was my bedroom, I’d be fine, never mind where the bed was.

You’d be wrong, though.

It wasn’t until 5:30 – with morning light already streaming in – that I finally fell asleep. Made me feel like a vampire. I was up three hours later. Would have loved to have slept in longer, but I have the kids this week, and I had an exciting day ahead, anyway.

Today, I earned my ghost-hunting merit badge.

I Want To Be The Next Jason. Or Grant. I’d Even Settle for Dave Tango.

A while back, I mentioned my ghost-hunting friend, Steven. He is a professional investigator, the president of GERCSA (the Ghost Education and Research Center; he dropped the San Antonio part when he relocated to the Pacific Northwest) and has been involved in many cases – both here and in Texas, where he’s from originally. He was even approached by the executive producer of Paranormal State to make an appearance on that show, though it didn’t happen due to scheduling conflicts. Well, I have a huge interest in the paranormal, having been weaned on a steady diet of Ghost Hunters episodes for years. This is something Steven and I bonded over. I basically begged him to let me tag along on an investigation sometime…and he actually listened!

He was contacted a while back by a homeowner in Vancouver, Washington whose mother’s house has been experiencing a lot of paranormal activity. It’s a 100-year old Victorian downtown, and she is hearing noises at night, seeing things moving, etc. Her adult son is scared for her, and looking for somebody to come in and help. Steven asked me a few weeks ago if I’d be interested in joining his team for an official investigation, and I said yesyesyesyesyesOHMYGODYESPLEASE!!! sure, I suppose I could tag along if my schedule is clear. OK, so I jumped at the chance! It’s the opportunity of a lifetime. I won’t just be hanging out with them, I’ll be participating fully. They’ve got EMF meters, digital voice recorders, HD cameras, and a laptop where we’ll be doing real-time monitoring for EVPs. Before I could be cleared, though, Steven insisted I attend a mandatory ghost hunting training class at his apartment, and today was the day.

I arrived about 12:45. We drove into Portland first, where I treated him to lunch at Bunk Sandwiches. As much as I love their pork belly Cubano, I wanted to try something new, and ordered the pulled pork with apple slaw. Steven got the same thing, and we both loved it. Afterwards, we returned to his place, where he spent the next few hours schooling me on the tricks of the trade. I learned how to properly use an EMF meter, what to look for when listening to EVPs, and how to conduct myself, both professionally (in front of the clients) and in the presence of any spirits (i.e. do not provoke; treat them with respect, instead). He played me a bunch of EVPs he has collected over the years, and some were quite clear and convincing. I was impressed. He quizzed me throughout the training session, and I passed with flying colors. I like Steven and his group because they exude integrity. They are not out to do this to get rich or famous, but rather, to help people while satisfying their own natural curiosity.

Saturday night, we’re meeting the clients at their house at 6 PM. We will then conduct an investigation until 2 AM. Steven warned me that it’s possible that we’ll end up with eight hours of nothing, but did say this case sounds very promising, and they usually have something interesting happen. I am super excited! Just to be involved in the process will be loads of fun.

I hope it’s a boo-tiful night!